MCLLM: My Chocolate Looking Like Milk

Lately women have so much perfume, make up and lipstick [I honestly don’t know if lipstick falls under the makeup category] that a “Pentecostal” hug [Ghana: clean and tidy] leaves my male friends thinking I’m gay, my girlfriend thinking I’m cheating on her, my boss thinking I have another job at a mine (makeup dust) and me thinking I’m being chloroformed for my kidneys due to the “hard to breath” perfume. My white shirt is looking brown; the red on it are not blood stains my doctor. Your honor I plead innocent; I’m not a murderer

I’m wondering, is she fairer these days or maybe it’s the weather. I love the Chocolate flavor. [Chocolate ice cream, Chocolate milkshake, chocolate cake, Extreme chocolate, chocolate croissant, mocha …]

So I order a chocolate drink. While waiting, I notice it gets worse in this “Food industry” business. The makeup is now cream and the effect is permanent but she doesn’t stir well, leaving her looking like a caramel leopard. I blame the customer, it’s the customers fault. The customer isn’t always right. We don’t ask for what we want. Skin cancer reminds her to think again not twice but more, but then a Nelson not Mandela gives her hope. I don’t know whether to point out the false positives or the true negatives. It’s negative; it would get ugly after it gets beautiful. I’m positive it would get worse until we make the right “order”. I’m getting impatient, what is the waiter doing?  So I look over my shoulder to see a white man married to a “white lady” with children darker than a black hole. Beyond them I see a lady looking bright as the sun on a typical Ghana Sunday. She notices me watching her and so she walks over to ask me what my problem is.

My mind is full of jokes but my mouth is empty. Are you shy? Do you like

 me she says? I said please sit down, you standing intimidates me. She sits ready to intimidate me out of curiosity. Her hand supporting her head looking into my soul.

I’m not nervous; I have a mission.The waiter brings my order and bill. I drop the money

with a generous tip. I sip,

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww, open the lid to check what I ordered with what I got. I slide the cup forward

And just before I leave I look at the waiter and then the lady and smile. You can keep it, I don’t want “my chocolate looking like milk”

p.s. or should I have taken her swimming? What if hers was waterproof? Would a hot shower do the trick? What if hers was permanent? What should I have done?

 Disclaimer: information on this blog/site may or may not be true and Yaw Darko OFFEI DARKO makes no warranty as to the validity of any and even implied claims All images and/or videos as well as gifs that appear on Yaw Darko OFFEI DARKO's blogs or websites are copyright of their respective owners and Yaw Darko OFFEI DARKO claims no credit for them unless otherwise noted if you own the right to any of the images and/or videos as well as gifs and do not wish them to appear on Yaw Darko OFFEI DARKO's websites, please contact us at yawoffei2003@gnail.com and they would promptly removed